Discovering Your Authentic Style: What a Girl Wants, What a Woman Needs

We all know the feeling – the elusive pursuit of finding clothes that truly speak to our personal style while simultaneously fitting perfectly. However, more often than not, we are faced with the frustrating dilemma of having to compromise on either liking a garment or it actually fitting well.

I’ll delve into the two main reasons behind this struggle and explore a heartwarming conversation with a wise 10-year-old client that sheds light on the transformative power of well-styled outfits.

When we try on clothes, there are two common reasons why they may not fit as desired:

  1. Incorrect Fit: The garment may be too tight, resulting in an awkward look or uncomfortable feel. It simply doesn’t align with our body’s proportions and curves.
  2. Misfitting Style: Sometimes, a piece may fit our body perfectly but fail to reflect our individual style goals. For instance, you may try on an impeccably fitting bright pink A-line dress, but it doesn’t resonate with your preference for more streamlined, powerful pieces with less frills.

During a recent consultation, a remarkable client named Leslie, who is just 10 years old, shared her experiences and insights on this topic. Leslie demonstrated a profound self-awareness of her likes and dislikes despite her young age. Like many women of all ages, she struggled to find pieces that truly worked for her and felt frustrated with her current wardrobe. Leslie discovered that wearing outfits that truly inspired her ignited newfound confidence. She noticed that when she felt self-conscious at school, she would second-guess herself, doubt her abilities, and struggle to assert herself. However, well-styled outfits empowered her to feel like her best, most authentic self.

Leslie’s story serves as a reminder that the impact of well-chosen clothes extends far beyond mere aesthetics. When we show up in outfits that align with our true selves, we radiate confidence and feel more at ease in our own skin. This realization can transform our wardrobes and our overall sense of self-worth and self-expression. 

My conversation with Leslie provided a unique perspective that resonates deeply with women five times her age. I want to share this with you to have you dig into your younger self again, which got lost throughout the years and experiences you’ve lived.

Next week, Leslie and I have a shopping trip planned. To ensure a truly personalized experience, I have meticulously crafted a customized shopping plan tailored to her specific needs. While her age calls for some adjustments compared to my adult clients, the core principles remain alike. Our focus will be on acquiring essential pieces that align with her style. These include ripped loose jeans, cargo pants, casual crop tops, layering pieces such as casual jackets and zip hoodies, and simple yet stylish jewelry.

Interestingly, Leslie’s shopping requirements mirror what every girl or woman desires, regardless of age:

1. Quality Matters: Leslie emphasized the importance of quality pieces that withstand time and frequent wear or washing. These are the garments that become a part of us, exuding a sense of familiarity and comfort.

2. The Confidence Boost of a Perfect Fit: When something fits well, it empowers us with confidence. We can move freely without needing to constantly adjust our clothing, allowing us to fully focus on being our authentic selves.

3. Investing in What We Love: Building a wardrobe that represents us involves investing in pieces we love and wear frequently. These carefully chosen pieces should effortlessly complement one another, creating a harmonious ensemble.

Leslie’s style goals include all the above and then some. She has a unique focus on clothing that uplifts her spirits. She refers to it as clothing that simply makes her happy. Whether it’s a splash of color or a special piece of jewelry, Leslie enjoys dressing in a way that reflects her mood – whether she’s feeling adventurous, low-key, or spicy.

It’s intriguing how as women grow older, we tend to prioritize function over the joy of self-expression in our clothing choices. We often overlook the importance of adding those distinct, unique pieces that truly light us up. However, the demands of a busy lifestyle should not hinder us from savoring the joy of our wardrobe. There is much wisdom to be gleaned from our younger selves, reminding us to embrace our individuality and dress in a way that ignites a carefree spirit within us once again. Life may have toughened us, but there’s no reason why we can’t feel free to dance as if no one is watching!

Now, let’s reflect on these questions together:

  • How did you express yourself through clothing when you were younger?
  • What steps did you take to stand out and feel truly confident in your outfits?
  • How can you integrate these youthful expressions of style into your present self?

My wardrobe was akin to an art collection, a curated expression of my true self. I strived to create outfits that distanced me from the crowd, emphasizing my unique identity. Colors and feminine pieces like dresses and skirts were my go-to choices. Collecting jewelry from my travels and selecting special looks for significant events brought immense joy and added a touch of glamour to my life.

We all experience seasons in life where it’s easy to lose sight of who we truly are. It can feel overwhelming to keep up with all the things we want to do and be. At times, we find ourselves in situations that demand our attention, leaving other parts of ourselves on the back burner. Whether it’s the arrival of a newborn or returning to school, or a career, our focus shifts.

If you’re in need of a gentle reminder today, take a moment to sit down and contemplate these questions. Find one simple step you can take to realign your wardrobe with your authentic self. How can you bring back some of the youthful aspects of your personality into your adult life?

Remember, I’m here to provide support and guidance on your journey toward living a fulfilling and stylish life. 

Please take a moment to leave a comment below, sharing your plans for moving forward. Let’s continue this conversation!

Looking for more styling tips? Be sure to follow The Closet Edit on Instagram @thecloset.edit and TikTok @theclosetedit!

Your Stylist,

tannya bernadette

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