Feeling stuck with dating? Even when you check all the boxes, nothing clicks?

In this week’s podcast episode of Make It You, stylist Tannya Bernadette is joined by dating coach Emily Freeman to unpack why high-achievers struggle with dating—and what real connection actually looks like.

Whether you’ve tried every strategy or are just tired of dating feeling transactional, this is your wake-up call: Connection isn’t a performance.

1. Connection Is Energy; Not Tactics

• You’re not attracting the right person because you treat love like a project.

• Real intimacy comes when we stop performing and start being seen, flaws and all.

• Action: Let go of the checklist mindset. Invite vulnerability instead.

2. Masculine and Feminine Live in Everyone; Bio Not Required

• Masculine energy: structure, pursuit, clarity.

• Feminine energy: intuition, presence, receptivity.

• The goal: feel both and know when to lean into each.

• Action: Learn the dance. Let the other lead sometimes; you don’t have to run the show every time.

3. “Nice Guy” vs. “Good Guy”; It’s All About What You Need

• A “nice guy” tries to earn love through pleasing, often unbeknownst even to himself.

• A “good guy” leads from alignment, not expectation.

• Action: Examine your motives. Are you doing something hoping for a payoff, or out of authentic desire?

4. Attraction Develops; Don’t Dismiss a Second Date Too Fast

• That gasping spark isn’t always sustainable or healthy.

• A baseline of comfort and curiosity? That’s worth exploring further.

• Action: Stay present on date two. Let the connection grow. Don’t judge chemistry too early.

5. Your Style Shows Your Self-Worth and Sparks Attraction

• Style is self-expression. Dressing well communicates, “I know who I am and I’m worth showing up for.”

• A t-shirt every time? Fine if you want casual, but not if you're courting the possibility.

• Action: Dress like you’re worth the effort, because you are.

6. Healing + Business + Love = A Full Expression

• Emily’s journey to her husband sparked her coaching business, and vice versa.

• She now coaches men and women into connection with themselves and others.

• Action: You don’t have to fix your past before finding love. Start with how you feel right now.

What to Do Next

1. Listen to the Full Episode
Get the full conversation packed with stories, insights, and real transformation.

2. Book a Consultation
Ready to transform your dating life from performative to magnetic? Let's talk, one-on-one.

You're not broken. You're just ready for a new way of relating to yourself and to love. Let’s make the shift together.